Could it be that I am a "modular" being, an aggregate of automatons? And is it possible that one "part of me", one "automaton", could logically deduce the "truth" of determinism, while another "part of me" could not (could not feel it, could not grok it, could not operate under that assumption?) And if that part of me was also a motivator of me? A "force"? A "director"? And if it was often "stronger" than the part that did get it?
"I" seem to operate on the assumption of both free will and determinism, variously or simultaneously...
Punishment. Reward. Say that I reject them. Does that mean the other guy will too? (but what do I care about that?) Holding people responsible is the default position. It "works" if I don't think about it. It's in the "best" interest of society, one supposes (and why "should" one care about that?)
If you step on my toes, I will react. Perhaps I'll take a step back and say "it's not your fault". But that's not my first reaction, and that does take time. Blame & praise are causal too, yes? No?
For me it's mostly about Darwin. But stuff is complicated...
It is odd that I can "see" that I is determined. And it is not odd at all. It was determined. I was determined to see it :)
Having read this, do you think me now guilty of "bad faith"?
EDIT: 1. Everything I say is redundant (and yet not).
2. I will go do my homework and read Steven Pinker's The Blank Slate now.